Frog statue insanity

I'm not a great fan of garden ornaments generally, but it's things like this, spotted on the back page of a garden catalogue that came through my door unprompted, that cement my view that they are a total waste of time and money.

What are these statues supposed to say about their owners? "Hey, we like frogs, but not in their natural, slimy, slug-eating form. We like to imagine they're froggy humans from fin de siecle England, pottering about the garden picking strawberries?" They're like something out of a Kafkaesque nightmare.

And what poor benighted person thinks, ooh, I'll have them for £35, I'm saving a fiver?

Furthermore, unlike other things you can put in the garden - sundials, bird baths and dovecotes, to name three - they serve no useful purpose whatsoever. Unless that spade the "man" frog is holding really is a spade that you can detach and use for a bit of light weeding.

Can anyone top this picture for hideousness?

Comments

[OyaDancer]

There's a home nearby in which such godsawful lawn "art" holds court. The entire front garden bit honestly looks like a mini-putt playground, complete with windmill over a fake stream. It's the most ghastly thing I've seen since...well...mini-putt playgrounds. I'm appalled someone out there thought it was a good idea; the amount of money spent on lawn gnomes, resin toadstools and African lawn jockeys with working lanterns would probably have fed an entire third world country...

Gah.

[Mildew]

I've just been reminded of a front garden near Oakwood tube station. It consists solely of gravel and big bright purple tubes. I'll take a picture of it soon and post it somewhere on the interweb. It needs to be seen to be believed.

[Jane Perrone]

... and you've reminded me of a front garden with a twee Bill and Ben pastiche made of large flowerpots!

[Ames Tiedeman]

What a great blog. I just learned a lot! Thanks!

[Nicole]

It's great blog...!